Nabisco Releases Orio
posted Thursday November 4th, 2010 by Crooks

According to reports originating from the TFL's home office, former Turkey Bowl MVP and free agent Tom "Cookie" Orio was released by Courtney "Nabisco" Orio this past week and cleared to participate in Turkey Bowl XI.

At the news of Tom's re-establishment as a 2010 competitor the TFL Board of Commissioners was convened to deliberate upon Mr. Orio's team allegiance. With the commissioners in agreement, a coin-toss was executed to decide the fate of Tom's status: Heads would place Tom on Four Lokos Deep, while Tails would signify Tom's acquisition by Grease Busters. The coin, one of two J.F.K. fifty-cent pieces housed within the case of the official TFL gavel, landed Tails up, formally declaring Tom as the ninth member of Grease Busters.

Tom becomes the 17th player to authorize his participation in Turkey Bowl XI, and only the third player in TFL history to join a team post-draft date.

Currently, Four Lokos Deep will be boasting a roster of eight-players: Mike Trill, Tim Dougherty, Kevin Rayer, Ian Hart, Jon Hart, Matt Marcelli, Keith Cottom, and Sean Kelly. Handling the QB duties for the Lokos will be then tandem of Mike Trill and Tim Dougherty, although both Trill and Doc could find themselves positional nomads depending on receiver and lineman needs. Trill and Dougherty are the only true quarterbacks in the TFL and are undefeated when paired together on the same team. Jon Hart and Keith Cottom will anchor the Loko offensive and defensive line, with spells served through the participation of Tim Dougherty. Both Hart and Cottom are former Turkey Bowl MVP's at their respected position. The defensive backfield and wide-receiver corps of the Lokos will include reigning TB MVP Kevin Rayer, three-year veteran Ian Hart, TFL founder Matt Marcelli, and situational-productive Sean Kelly. Keith Cottom will most likely be handling the punting duties, much to the chagrin of Dougherty, while most of us expect to see Kevin Rayer acting as the team's return-man on special teams.

Four Lokos opposition, Grease Busters, adds a ninth man to their roster with Tom Orio. Joining Tom will be Tuna Bucella, Chris Crooks, Rich DiNofia, Tony Laughlin, Mark Marcelli, Paul Middleton, Bill Pohlig, and Joe Simcox. As of right now the Busters lack a definitive QB threat, but Paul Middleton has proven he is capable of throwing the ball, while, with the addition of Tom Orio and presence of Joe Simcox, Mike Bucella and Tony Laughlin are free to rotate in as the signal-caller. The Grease Busters are looking at four adequate lineman: Bucella, Laughlin, Orio, and Simcox. Bucella and Orio served as TB IX Co-MVP's for their efforts as offensive linemen, while Tony Laughlin has been more of a defensive line threat over the years. Making his sophomore debut, Joe Simcox will be asked to fill in holes within the line and receiving corps when needed. We can expect to see Middleton, Crooks, Pohlig, Mark Marcelli, DiNofia, and even Tom Orio at defensive-back, safety, and receiver spots. Look for Middleton and Orio to rotate in a little less frequently than Pohlig, DiNofia, Crooks, and Marcelli, but, chances are, Tom and Paul will have at least one reception apiece. Kick-off and punting duties will most likely go to Bucella and Laughlin, while Middleton, the best special team's player in the league, will take the return responsibilities.

Analyzing both teams statistically and without bias illustrates that there is only one major discrepancy between them: Touchdown Passes. Four Lokos, obviously with both Trill and Dougherty on their roster, holds the advantage when it comes to the passing game. In addition, it must be noted that the Lokos receivers hold quite a height advantage in comparison to the Grease Busters wide-outs. In the trenches, I truly believe that, especially with the addition of Tom Orio, Grease Busters has the better line. That's not an insult towards Cottom, Hart, or even Dougherty, but, in comparison, the trio of Tony, Bucella, and Orio is just a bit more formidable.

Being as objective as possible, I would have to give the overall advantage to Four Lokos Deep, as well as declare them the TB XI favorite. Now, let me make it abundantly clear that, over the years, we've all learned that what we perceive on paper and what actually happens in any game is, at least half of the time, completely unexpected or unrelated. We've seen games in which teams who considered themselves overall favorites fall and falter in atrocious manners, as well as teams who were thought to stand on an uneven playing field either challenge or win against more talented teams.

It is in that fact that we realize the best thing about Turkey Bowl: On any day, any one player or team can beat another. There have been years where Tim Dougherty has looked leaps and bounds better than Mike Trill, and other times and games where Trill's performance overshadowed Doc's as if Trill were the Empire State Building and Tim were an ant-hill. We have seen times in which Rich DiNofia presented himself as the most dominant receiver on the field, outscoring the likes of Kevin Rayer, Matt Marcelli, Mark Marcelli, Chris Crooks, and Bill Pohlig. We have watched Tom Orio play atrociously, then, in the next Turkey Bowl, be named an MVP. At any given moment, time, or game, the reasoning behind who will play well and why can change and shift in momentum or direction without any discernable or predictable rhyme or reason.

At the moment I truly believe that, based on the height of their receivers and the quarterback situation that Four Lokos has the edge and should rightfully be considered the TB XI favorite, but, at the same time, I question myself for a number of reasons: Tim Doc, the perpetual underdog, having to play the role of the favorite, the line rotation of Four Lokos stacked up against the linemen of Grease Busters, the defensive prowess of Mark Marcelli and Rich DiNofia, etc. In any situation or analysis, a case can be made to write in either team as the winner, but at this moment I believe that Four Lokos presents a better argument. I am not wrong in saying that being a Grease Buster; being the underdog is not necessarily a bad thing. I have confidence and my team and know that we can win. I simply just realize that we, Grease Busters, must do more to win in the realm of passing and coverage to do so.